I am 13...I knew it was wrong.

I am me, I am you, I am he, I am she, I am all of us; people. I change with the news, with the times, with my friends, with the trends, with your experiences and with mine…



Today I am 13 and my Uncle molests me. It started when I was 12 but I didn’t know what to do because he is Mummy’s younger brother. I tried to tell Mummy but I didn’t know how to tell her. Mummy and Uncle Daisi are very close. They talk everyday and go out together. He helps Mummy in the shop so he stays with us. Every time I tell him to stop, he says he would beat me if I talk. At first he just held be down but now he gets angry when I try to struggle. I have seen uncle very angry before. He is very scary. I didn’t know what he was doing when he started, but I knew it was wrong.

The first time it happened, Mummy sent me to the kitchen to get Maltina from the fridge. Uncle was just coming home when I entered the kitchen. I was so happy to see Uncle so I ran to give him a big hug like I always do. He smelled like Daddy after his favorite drink: Coca Cola and Guinness. His eyes were red just like he had been crying, but he was smiling and walking funny. He carried me up and put me on his lap. He said, “Give your uncle a BIIIGGG kiss”, so I kissed him on his cheek. He said, “Just one! How can you give your Uncle Daisi just one kiss”? I was giggling. “Give your Uncle another BIG BIG BIG kiss”! So, I kissed him on his other cheek and stuck out my tongue to make a funny face. I tried to leave Uncle’s lap to get the maltina, but he held me tight. His face had changed now and his hands were moving from my waist to my stomach. I thought he was playing so I started to laugh and play fight, but his face was still serious. I was getting scared. I had never seen Uncle’s face like this before. So I said, “Uncle, I have to get Mummy’s Maltina o”. He said, “You’ll get it after. Wait”. So I waited. I wanted to leave, but I didn’t know how. He was my Big Uncle.

Uncle started rubbing my back with his left hand, then my legs with his right hand. His hand started moving up my legs then under my dress. I wanted to tell him to stop but how can I tell Big Uncle to stop? Mummy said it is rude to talk back to people older than you or to tell them they are wrong. I knew Uncle was wrong but I could not tell him. So, I just put my hands on my lap. I was shaking. My eyes were getting hot. I can’t cry. I am a big girl. His hand started moving up and up till it reached my pant. I tried to get up again but he pushed me down. He was too strong. I said, “Mummy sent me. She’s waiting for her Maltina”. His left hand stopped rubbing my back and he held me tighter. He said, “Just wait, it’s a game. You’ll like it”. Then he started touching me there. I started crying. I didn’t know what to do because it felt funny. His eyes were closing and he was kissing my neck. I started feeling something hard on my bum-bum, and Uncle was breathing fast. I don’t like this game. I was pulling my dress down and crying, “Uncle please, let me go. Mummy’s Maltina, please”. He didn’t hear me. He didn’t stop.

Mummy started calling me: “Kemi! Where is the Maltina I sent you to bring? Abi o ti sun lo ni? Oniranu omo kekere”! Uncle jumped up. I had to bring her Maltina but I didn’t want her to see me. Uncle walked to sink to wash his hands and gave me his white handkerchief to clean my face. I was ashamed. I kept smoothing my dress down with my left hand, and wiping my tears with my right hand. I didn’t like this new game at all. I don’t want to play it again. I didn’t like Uncle too for teaching me. I rushed to the fridge to get Mummy’s Maltina and left as fast as I could to meet Mummy. Just by looking at her fuming, I could not tell her.